The ripple effect of the pandemic has proved all-encompassing, affecting even the most personal aspects of life – relationships. Its fascinating impact ranges from hastening proposals and weddings to uncoupling bonds. However, for many single Canadians, the increasing instances of others reaching relationship milestones, whether it be engagements, marriages or cohabitation, are inflicting emotional strain, as unveiled by a nationwide survey.
The survey, carried out by Canadian online mental health practice, Shift Collab, surveyed 1,504 Canadians to understand the correlation between their relationship status and mental health. It was discovered that 59% of participants conceded that their mental well-being was adversely impacted by their singleness, whether current or past.
Adding another layer to this complex issue, the isolation felt by 60% of youthful participants, aged between 18 and 34, exacerbated feelings of alienation and magnified their sense of being the only ones not in a relationship.
According to Megan Rafuse, CEO and co-founder of Shift Collab, the online intensity of relationships heightened during the pandemic due to the time people devoted to one another, leading to a surge in relationship milestones being announced on social media. Shift Collab therapists have also noticed a surge in clients battling feelings of loss concerning missed life milestones, inspiring the nationwide survey that corroborated these findings.
As the Shift Collab survey also highlighted, 33% of Canadians within the 18 to 34 age bracket have felt their expectations about starting a family pivot due to the pandemic, leading 31% to experience feelings of solitude.
As Rafuse acknowledged, the pandemic was a major catalyst for increased anxiety, particularly associated with achieving life milestones such as meeting a partner or getting married. She pinned these anxieties on the hurdles that arose in dating, meeting new people, and even planning events during the pandemic lockdown rules.
Anxiety, worry, and stress have been exacerbated by uncertainty and fear for many. Furthermore, social media, a platform often overflowing with engagement and wedding posts, has become a comparison trap for 27% of single Canadians, making them feel more disappointed about their own relationship status.
With over a third of Canadians considering therapy to deal with their relationship status, Rafuse advises that no Canadian should ever feel isolated in their feelings. She asserts that counselling can help individuals safely identify and manage feelings of sadness, anxiety, and depression. Rafuse has a few tips for managing the negative effects of others reaching milestones – acknowledging the feelings, putting them in perspective, recognizing that others nationwide may be facing the same challenges, and focusing on the aspects within one’s control.
In a final note, Rafuse encourages people to shift their perspective on milestones, emphasizing that our definitions of life milestones need not be restricted to engagements, weddings, children, or home ownership. Instead, she advises them to celebrate what’s unique to their own life path. A pivotal reframing of milestones that subtly urges individuals to cherish their personal journey and their transformation through time.
