My desk is full of papers. I have dozens of emails waiting for replies and regular mail to open. The magazine and newspaper pile has significantly grown. The “To Do” list is very long and also needs my attention. I’ve got a lot of stuff to do…
But…I don’t care. I’m pleasantly in a fog. A glorious fog that rolled into my life. The same kind of dense fog you might wake up to along the coast of Maine. The billows of damp mist that rolls onto the coastline. The kind that feels cold, wet and humid. The kind of fog that immediately curls my untamed mane and dampens my skin.
The fog that creates an incubated quiet which beckons a great read under a cozy blanket. The “let’s wait it out” with hopes it might or might not lift off the ground and dissipate when it hits the flora.
The quiet dense fog that will most likely disappear before noon and reveal the spectacular sunny beach day we all yearn for.
I’m loving every minute of this personal and private fog. I love being in my clouds.
Actually, I really need to re-enter my life. I don’t want to. There’s an internal fight going on within me.
Sue, you’ve got to get to this stuff. Sue, let’s start tomorrow. Sue, your vacation is over. I don’t want this to ever end. I want to hang on to this for…EVER!
Here’s an idea, write about this fog… Ok, I’ll start with that…
It’s glorious to be in vacation mode. Now, I re-read my journal and remind myself of my most recent vacation experience. I don’t want to forget all the little details as though it was perfect, even though it wasn’t. My lasting memory will be that it was perfect.
Since my return, the realistic visual of my desk pressures me to re-enter the work world. I really don’t want to. I want to stay where the limestone meets the sky and the heat of the day penetrates its walls. I want to be running in the dense heat at night. I want to be picnicking on yummy fresh foods at the beach. I want to stay in this FOG!
I don’t want to be at my desk.
Then the little voice in my head says, Sue, in life there needs to be a work/play balance. You can’t always be on vacation. You need to be responsible, helpful and useful. Balance in life is a good life.
Fine… I started. Here it is… I’m typing…
La de da… So, when is my next vacation? SUE, FOCUS!
Being busy is good too! Having a goal, a focus, a purpose is very important. Earning and participating in the means to live, help and heal is necessary.
But… I want to walk along the beach especially when the fog is present and rolling in blanketing my world. I want to drift like wood along the crest of the waves. Perhaps even tumbleweed along a barren path somewhere in the direction of Graceland.
I want to La De Da some more!!!
Supertramp – From Now On
Monday has come around again I’m in the same old place With the same old faces always watching me Who knows how long I’ll have to stay Could be a hundred years Of sweat and tears At the rate that I get paid
Sometimes I slowly drift away From all the dull routine That’s with me every day A fantasy will come to me Diamonds are what I really need Think I’ll rob a store, escape the law And live in Italy
Sounds like how I feel.
I’m working on being fabulously foggy, forever!