Fraud Victim Fights Back: Co-founds Counselling Centre for Scam Survivors

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The moment Cecilie Fjellhøy handed over £200,000 to a swindler, leaves a profound scar on her heart – a product of profound trust dashed by cold deception. Months of deep-seated faith and an ostensible relationship had convinced her to secure multiple loans to aid her fraudulent lover. Now, six years later, she is yet somewhat besieged by the fiscal and emotional aftermath of that harrowing episode.

“My future is peppered with financial blemishes,” she expresses, adding that her ongoing psychological therapy provides a stark reminder of her ordeal. Perplexingly, her traumatic experience has sparked a fervour in her to aid other victims of fraud. With the help of fellow activist and former romantic fraud victim, Anna Rowe, Fjellhøy co-founded LoveSaid, a fraud counselling centre and think tank.


Manifesting their passionate advocacy in combating romantic scams, Anna and Cecilie serve as key advocates in BBC Three’s telling documentary, Hunting the Catfish Crime Gang. At the heart of the documentary is entrepreneur James Blake, a victim whose Instagram pictures have been unlawfully purloined and exploited to deceive people out of significant sums.

Many have cast a shadow of doubt over Fjellhøy’s experience, questioning her susceptibility to such an elaborate hoax, while others are interrogating their personal immunity against falling into a similar snare. Indeed, in today’s digital age, scams, as some would say, are practically omnipresent. A report by Citizens Advice divulges that an estimated 40 million adults found themselves targeted by scammers in just the first quarter of 2023.

Dr. Elisabeth Carter, a renowned criminologist and forensic linguist, explores the cunning linguistic tactics employed by defrauders. She adeptly illustrates how they manipulate their victims into believing their own decisions are logical, thereby bypassing suspicion. This illusion can be achieved by fostering a sense of vulnerability, suggesting they too, have been besmirched in the past by scamming machinations.

In the case of Fjellhøy’s swindler, a notorious character from Netflix’s 2022 documentary, The Tinder Swindler, he convinced her he was in danger, with nefarious foes hot on his tail, though no conviction has come forth from the allegations made against him. She asserts that such manipulative tactics bear a striking resemblance to domestic abuse and coercive control methods.

Rebecca Mason, a fraud detective with an expertise in romantic scams, reveals a consistent red flag across such deceptions: fraudsters’ aversion to personal meetings. She urges caution towards perceived inconsistencies in communication and cautions about sharing personal information prematurely. The romance scam perpetrators, she explains, are often part of an organised crime group.

Both professionals stress the importance of trusting one’s instinct – to act as one’s detective, and to report the crime whenever encountered. While romantic scams may be a frightening variant of fraud due to their intimate violation, they certainly aren’t the only modality of deception plaguing the digital landscape.

No matter the scamming method, beware of autopilot responses, advises Elisabeth. Utilise tools provided by anti-fraud collaborations like Stop Scams UK, who operate trusted helpline 159 for clamorous concerns related to potential banking fraud.

Above all else, Cecilie emphasises the importance of addressing scam victims with empathy and understanding, noting the regrettable stigma that often follows the victims rather than the scammers. Ultimately, her story and the experts’ advice serve as stark reminders and valuable lessons: maintain vigilance in digital relationships, scrutinise your communications, withhold personal information, and report suspicions to aid in the protection of others from fraud.